Ray, my man, my future man, my centennial man, you did it. You actually did it.

Assuming you’re still well within your cognitive capacities and you don’t need help wiping your own keister, it’s been a remarkable life. You made it, having raised someone else’s kid as your own, and look at him, the fruits of your labors, the devotion of your highest principles, no matter that awful period of time in his formative years. Look at what he’s achieved with his own life. How prouder of that boy now man can you be? Every time you hear the lines of Bob Marley’s “Redemption Song,” doesn’t it automatically summon sweet memories of the kid learning it on his own and raising himself out his own ruts?

You broke hearts, you lost friends and family in the process, and yet, look at what you brought to yourself in your second marriage and the rebirth of your life. You not only gained the loyalty of your son for never giving up on him, you not only replaced what you lost trifold with new family and friends, you found the love of your life, man. Not many people are so fortunate to be able to say they’ve loved on the deepest plane a couple can share. You gave yourself–all of yourself–to TJ, and what a beautiful marriage it was! She was your partner all the way through, even at the bottom of pint glasses on that life-changing first date, closing down an Irish pub, An Poitin Stil, on a Sunday night. You both fell in love on instant, and what a life you two built together.

Look at what you achieved on your own through fitness until you couldn’t do it any longer. You devoted yourself, you bettered yourself, you discovered your flaws and weaknesses and sought to change them when you found them or others delicately shared them with you. You always lived by a code of open-mindedness to all walks of life and cultures and you tried so many life-enriching things! Your friend set was, and still is, beautifully diverse, the sign of enlightenment you preached in silence most of your life. You cultivated your body and your mind and not everything was a win, but many of it was. You had the gift of appreciating that which life and the divine gave you and you making it to 100 years? Dude, you’ve been so blessed and I know you’re sitting there, feeble you may be, ready to join the Lord and Lady, to finally hug Anubis in person and to tackle Bast and Sekhmet in their feline avatars for their continuous graces. Likewise, to thank Christ in person for being there from birth to your untold end.

You were a writer, Ray, one who sometimes doubted himself, who sometimes writhed in quiet agony when the rejections and the obtuse “California no’s” piled on. You were an A-lister heavy metal and punk rock journalist and you rubbed elbows with most of the heroes you loved in your teens. You wrote many stories, some of which were appreciated, some ignored, but you gave yourself to your craft, knowing how much it hurt writers half your age had the faster track or were simply more advanced than you at the time. You never gave in to the boiling anger. You threatened to quit, but you had a woman who believed in you and read all of your work with the courage to criticize, even when you both didn’t see eye-to-eye. You both had different views on writing, but you loved each other enough to push your brands and to get yourselves out there, even as a tag-team at signing events.

I reiterate; TJ is a love well-earned and lived. You did the right thing, for your son, for your former spouse and also for yourself, no matter the initial pain of it. It was short-lived, because TJ was sent to you within months of being on your own as you are no doubt right now. She made you rise up. She refused to let you fizzle out, even all those years ago. She revitalized you. Your wedding was a magickal fairy tale to a Bohemian princess and I know if you’re having trouble remembering details at age 100, all you need do is look at those old photos. Remember how it poured all day and yet, everyone still came to the ceremony? A Wiccan ritual with a Christian overture to it, one your guests raved over. The gods and goddesses blessed you immensely.

However long you may have from this point forward, Ray, know you touched people as you have been touched. The ancestors have been watching and waiting and are jealous of your endurance, as they cannot wait to embrace you as much as commend you. To the final end, Ray, make your remaining time worthy of a defiant Godzilla roar, because that’s who you were and have always been. Godzilla with a conscience. You’d rather people hear and see your glory instead of wreaking havoc, though you did that very thing a few times in your life. Repent your sins one last time and then forgive yourself. It’s been a good life, a worthy life.

Above all, love yourself as you did everyone who was touched by you, past and present. Your son is your greatest triumph. Your stepchildren are superb, beautiful and righteous and above all, true to themselves. Give them all your best smile as often as you can. They won’t have you forever.

Your are loved, Ray, and you did a damned fine job. The best compliment you ever got, and it was given three times, is the Yiddish phrase, “mensch.” You knew the magnitude and the responsibility that comes with. Never forget it to your final breath.

I love you, old man. You nailed this whole life thing to the sheets.

Ray 2024