Willow Croft, who has quickly become a friend of our craft to me, invited me back for another sit-down chat, this time for her “Spooky Six” series at Horror Tree. As before with Willow, a total blast.
Check ‘er out:
https://horrortree.com/the-spooky-six-with-willow-croft-and-ray-van-horn-jr/
I literally had the wind sucked out of me to get the notification the title story from my short story collection, “Coming of Rage” has been nominated for the illustrious Pushcart Prize. Humbled is one the first words coming to mind, knowing all the esteemed writers who have been nominated for a Pushcart, much less won.
As the deepest personal story in my book, I am so moved “Coming of Rage” has resonated with my audience enough to be in consideration of something of this magnitude. Grateful beyond words. Squeeeeee!!!
Coming of Rage is available through Lulu, Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Nook, Kobo and Kindle.
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/coming-of-rage-ray-van-horn-jr/1141914814
lulu bookstore (paperback)
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/coming-of-rage-ray-van-horn-jr/1141909254
https://www.kobo.com/us/en/ebook/coming-of-rage
Thank you for your ongoing support!
–Ray Van Horn, Jr.
Taking on a major project by yourself takes guts. It also takes a lot more from you and out of you, as I learned when I attempted to launch my own digital heavy music and horror magazine, Retaliate, in 2010. A road briefly traveled, then abandoned.
I’d spent the seven years prior years knocking myself out working my way up through the tiers of music and film journalism and I’d been writing simultaneously for numerous magazines and websites. I wrote monthly columns, conducted more than 300 personality interviews and reviewed more than a thousand promotional albums and videos. Blabbermouth, Metal Maniacs, Dee Snider’s House of Hair Online, Pit, Rough Edge.com, About.com Heavy Metal, Fangoria Musick, Horror News.net, DVD Review, Unrestrained to name a few, along with numerous others.
I slept very little. I worked a full-time job, then went out to cover shows, interview bands, staying up in the late hours after gigs to transcribe and turn in copy for deadlines. Up until 4:30 a.m. in the rock life, back up at 7:30 a.m. for the mortgage title life. I did a lot of my phoner interviews during lunch breaks in the conference room of my employer, sometimes with a small audience. Repeat, rinse, all with horns hoisted high in the air. With the transition in media toward the digital age, however, the fatigue finally struck once I found myself, along with my colleagues, dropped to the bricks as trad print mags folded, one-by-one.
It was a very difficult and upsetting thing for me to digest since one, a lot of my secondary income was tied into my freelancing work for those rags, especially once I became a new father when we adopted my son. I’d already learned to fight for work, having been downsized from the mortgage title industry on numerous occasions, since the rollercoaster nature of that business dictates employment.
One thing that kept me going during this bruising time to my writing life was my old heavy metal blog, The Metal Minute. I used it as outlet for the countless promotional albums hitting my mailbox which I couldn’t cover for assignment. I did my “Take 5” interview series with artists, and I was able to service many of my longtime publicist and record label contacts that way. The Metal Minute boomed. I wrangled a large, devoted audience and before I laid it to rest, I’d collected more than 900,000 hits and was bestowed the honor of “Best Personal Blog” by Metal Hammer magazine.
While building and branding The Metal Minute, I found myself being courted by loads of websites who couldn’t afford to pay me. Would that I could write merely for the passion of it as I’d first done, but I’d become a paid professional by then. I’d nearly bowed out of media journalism altogether during this phasing out period. My attempts as a veteran scene writer to coax assignment froms editors of the few remaining big dog hubs were met with frustration. So too became the fate of many of my peers, since those periodicals still hanging on were well-fortified with staffers and freelancers already. I think most writers reading this, regardless of experience and time involved, can relate.
I’ve worn many hats in small-league journalism, and with mounting bills and a young mouth to feed, I turned to beat reporting for a local newspaper, as well as field data collection for Patch.com. I was grateful for the work but still feeling that itch of addiction from being in the music scene. I’d done interviews backstage, on tour buses, in pubs and restaurants. I’d even taken one of my guests to 7-11 after our chat in his hotel room and our off-the-record extension was one of the more memorable times of my writing life. The promos kept logjamming my mailbox, since I was receiving hard copy materials before those went digital like the magazines.
It wasn’t a long layoff, but I quickly missed the road dogging, shooting concert photos from the pit, talking with artists and sharing pints and life stories after their gigs. As The Metal Minute gathered steam, I got a smarmy bug up my butt and came up with the idea that maybe I should take on the digital realm and begin my own venture. I had all the industry contacts I needed to get launched, so why the hell not?
Wolf Hoffmann – Accept
To this day, I still thank every publicist and record label who got on board with me when I proposed to launch Retaliate, a digital magazine focused on heavy metal, punk rock, hard and classic rock and horror films. By now, it’s been a proven fact horror and heavy music are natural bed partners, which I’ve said and lived since the Eighties. It was a winning concept my industry friends and guests all believed in and I can’t express my gratitude enough for their generous time and friendship.
I deemed myself Editor-in-Chief, and recalling my time as Assistant Editor on my college newspaper, Spectrum, I used my old layout techniques and learned to apply them in a digital format. Just this part of the process took a bit of time to refine before I began the months-intensive succession in assembling my debut issue.
Wearing multiple hats, I took on every aspect in making Retaliate a reality. I booked and conducted every interview. I fielded the music reviews. I did the live photography and used a handful of supplemental press photos donated from the labels. I laid it all out and banged my head against my desk when the pages wouldn’t merge in succession, then rejoiced when they finally did. Outside of the cover fonts and logo, which I owe to my dear friend in Denmark, Sheila Eggenberger, everything was done my me. I sometimes bounced my son (then a toddler) on my knee while I edited my articles and told him I was going to do something big for our family. It sounded good, anyway.
Jacoby Shaddix – Papa Roach
I engaged a partner, who was going to handle online production and distribution. By the time I was ready to release Retaliate # 1 with a test price of $2.50 per download, I was already finding hints of gray on my head. Twelve years ago, hard to get my nearly grayed-out head around it.
I’d assembled a hell of a guest list for Retaliate #1: Marky Ramone, Dave Lombardo from Slayer, Jacoby Shaddix from Papa Roach, Stevie Benton from Drowning Pool, Richard Patrick of Filter, Chris Adler from Lamb of God, Wolf Hoffmann of Accept, Jim Gustafson of Poobah, former Overkill drummer Rat Skates, Nick Cantanese, formerly of Black Label Society, Steve Von Till of Neurosis, Alexx Calisse and others. I had esteemed horror directors Mick Garris and Adam Green on board for my “Van of the Dead” horror section. It was newbie gold.
I took to the pre-launch campaign trail and staged some goofy promotional photos with me pimping Retaliate. One has me standing amidst a flurry of regional political candidate placards with my own stating “RETALIATE FOR READERSHIP.” Another one has me dressed up as Pinhead from Hellraiser hitchhiking along an interstate with a sign stating “RETALIATE OR BUST.” These photos were sent to all of my press contacts and I was offered publicity services from a few firms out there. I wanted to get the first issue running and then take them up on it to implement my marketing plan. All of it felt red-hot.
I’d grinded for many weeks hitting concerts to gather my live photos and interviews. I took phone calls at ungodly hours to conduct chats with those who I couldn’t connect with on the road. I was giddy beyond words through the whole thing, though, most especially when Marky Ramone and I kept playing phone tag with bad connections on our cells. I hightailed it back to my work office at the time and begged the use of their phone to get it done with Marky. As a Ramones freak, it was one of the most gratifying interviews I’ve ever done.
I could spend the rest of this post gabbing about the wonderful interviews I had for Retaliate # 1. I won’t forget Adam Green getting on a roll about the production behind his frigid terror zone in his horror film, Frozen, and him generously asking me if he could call back after fielding other scheduled chats, because he had plenty more to talk about. He kept his word and we were back on the phone with shivery stories on his crew working with live wolves.
On the nuttier side of things, my interview with Dave Lombardo was completely insane as I waited for my liaison to come get me, which ended up being pretty danged long. I was scheduled to photograph Slayer and Anthrax’s sets at the Baltimore Arena and by the time I was finally brought back to Lombardo on Slayer’s bus, I was given a meager five minutes. We did a lightning round that I think left both us dizzy afterwards. Dave Lombardo, one of the finest metal drummers to ever pick up the sticks, was a gentleman. I’m sorry to see what happened later in the Slayer camp, since I’ve also had an amazing chat with Tom Araya in the past.
I’ll never forget seeing the late Jeff Hanneman lounging on Slayer’s bus and jamming to Led Zeppelin with a hundred lit candles around him. We said hello to each other in passing and that still strikes me today now that Jeff has passed. Afterwards, I had to blitz and navigate my way from the arena loading docks to the rear of the stage on mere instinct for the layout. I waved my laminate badge like a lunatic to the bouncers and stage hands as I bolted into the photo pit as Anthrax began their set. It’s something you can’t necessarily put into words, but it was a huge rush, disorganized as that night ended up being. Anyone in the biz would simply say, that’s just rock ‘n roll for you.
Running into Stevie Benton of Drowning Pool a week after we’d interviewed in the photo pit of Godsmack was a kick and Stevie was cool enough to take a selfie with me, center stage. I’d done phoners with Benton, Jacoby Shaddix of Papa Roach and Adam Green back-to-back, another chaotic but wonderful night of the Retaliate cycle. Arch Enemy, I’d been asked by their record label to have a shipment of merch and CDs sent to my house the day of the gig I covered, since they were running out on the road. It was my pleasure to do so, and guitarist Mike Amott gave me a terrifc on-site chat in accordance.
Angela Gossow – former lead vocalist, Arch Enemy
And then reality struck.
As I was ready to hand over my work to my partner upon execution of a formal business agreement, the guy flaked out on me. No response, no further communication. I had to find out from a mutual friend he’d blown off our little enterprise despite his enthusiasm by my progress. In scrambling mode, I found another party who expressed interest but once again, those overtures fizzled out. This was all before I taught myself DIY digital press.
I attempted to pitch Retaliate on Kickstarter and was shot down. I even had donations from my guests as incentives. I then opened ties with one of my guests and we nearly got Retaliate off the ground together, but his prior commitments took precedence. Fair enough, and by that time, my material was in danger of being too old to be marketable. Besides, the true reality of things is nobody wants to pay for what they get for free everywhere else on the web, regardless of product quality.
With gnashed teeth and a heavy heart, I decided to throw the pages of Retaliate onto The Metal Minute for free as a commitment to everyone who participated in my endeavor.
To be honest, the entire experience ragged me out and I was in the throes of fatherhood anyway. Thus I pulled the plug on Retaliate, even as I received a nice outpouring of support from the industry. I’d had high hopes, as the song goes, but it takes more than a mere man these days to accomplish anything of significance. Retaliate was and still is my baby and I look at those pages with tremendous pride and gratitude toward the musicians, directors, publicists and labels who gave me their time.
I thank them all for the crazy adventure that was Retaliate. To the good, it was an indirect path to leading to my six-year writing stint with industry leader, Blabbermouth. To all who helped me, encouraged me, pushed me when I wanted to say forget it and above all, hung out with me at the aftershows, cheers, you beautiful people…
–Ray Van Horn, Jr.
In my 16 years writing in the music industry, I covered many genres, though metal and punk were my bread and butter. I was blessed to have interviewed more than 300 artists in my time on the scene. Alice Cooper, Rob Zombie, Rob Halford, Nicko McBrain, Marky Ramone, Nita Strauss, David Coverdale, Lita Ford, Doro Pesch, Glenn Danzig, Serj Tankian, Sebastian Bach, Otep, Ace Frehley, Dee Snider, Biff Byford, Jacoby Shaddix, just to name a few…
I was enjoying a ride through my portfolio of tear sheets from this gratifying period of my writing life, and I may throw a few scans here at Roads Lesser Traveled if readership interest is there.
For now, I want to share one of my favorite interview assignments ever, Gerry Casale of 80s new wave legends, Devo. I was always a fan of Devo back in the day and spun in my desk chair faster than one of the band’s spiraling energy dome hats when the offer was put before me. I bounced around my office singing the chorus of Devo’s stomping sociological rant, “Freedom of Choice.” “Freedom of choice…is what you got…freedom from choice…is what you want…”
I interviewed Gerry in 2011 for The Big Takeover as Devo had just released their superb comeback album, Something For Everybody. My chat on the phone with Gerry was one of the most memorable I’ve drawn in my career–and I’ve had a ton of memorable interview sessions done backstage, on tour buses, hotel rooms, in bars and restaurants and over the phone.
Gerry was there at the Kent State riot in 1970, the year I was born. You can’t wholly detect it in word, but over the phone, Gerry had a grim and somber recount of the event I’ll never forget. I even got Gerry to talk about Devo’s apperance on the short-lived 80s teen show Square Pegs, a beginning point for Sarah Jessica Parker.
Have a go with this enlightening chat with one of the all-time greats of counterculture music:
–Ray Van Horn, Jr.
Before superheroes hijacked mainstream pop culture, I got involved as a writer with Cyber Age Adventures from 1999 to 2001. CAA was then an online hub of creator-owned superhero fiction and I had the pleasure of working the likes of Frank Fradella, Jade Walker, Sean Taylor, Justin V. Gray, Pete Lombardo and so many other talented writers and artists whose names make me smile to recall.
Those were primitive times for the internet, and yet it was my privilege to shuttle about 15 stories in serialized fiction form to our faithful readers. Many of these were collected in the fourth Cyber Age Adventures paperback compilation, “Playing Solitaire.” I’d enjoyed a strong following to my “Kyoto Bushido” epic and my other original characters like Revolutionary and Emerald Fox. It’s been a hoot to look back at my work from this period, and after I put other projects to rest, I believe a 23 year catch-up with Revolutionary in particular will be in order…
Hello, friends! Today I’m proud as all get out to share links to my book, “Coming of Rage.” It comes available in paperback and e-book from Raw Earth Ink. I hope you enjoy these stories as much as I did putting them together. Much love and thanks for your support!
Paperback links:
https://www.lulu.com/…/paperback/product-ny256n.html…
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/coming-of-rage-ray-van-horn-jr/1141914814
E-book links:
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/coming-of-rage-ray-van-horn-jr/1141909254
https://www.kobo.com/us/en/ebook/coming-of-rage
https://www.lulu.com/shop/ray-van-horn-jr/coming-of-rage/ebook/product-87wkjm.html?page=1&pageSize=4
I recently reconnected with an old writer friend from my college newspaper days, and we had such a refreshing catch-up leading to a discussion about my book, “Coming of Rage,” coming out soon through Raw Earth Ink. In my time interviewing bands and film directors, I was fortunate to be on the other end a few times, and now comes this fun opportunity to chat up my work. Credited to “Terry A.,” this was a total blast and I thank her for her courtesy in letting me gab about “Coming of Rage.”
Where did you come up with the title, “Coming of Rage?” It kind of gives me the shivers, though the way you describe the collection of short stories, it’s a far different thing altogether.
Right. The title story, “Coming of Rage,” was the root of the book’s concept and it’s an accurate depiction of an event which happened to me the summer before 7th grade. I lived in a rough neighborhood where drugs, bullies and vandalism were the norm, and this was the early 1980s. It wasn’t inner-city, but a suburb that had all the illusions back in 1981 and ’82 of being a desirable middle class townhouse development. Back then, it was hardly the case.
I went through a lot back then, and after many months of getting bullied and beat up in sixth and seventh grades, I’d hit the point where enough was enough. The day I trashed five boys at school in response to this long-escalating abuse revealed the ugliest, most violent side of myself I don’t ever care to see again. For this story’s purposes, “Coming of Rage” is a prequel of sorts, when I was betrayed by a friend I had a crush on and though no fighting occurred against the antagonists involved in the story and for real, it marked my beginning of a point of no return. The way the story ends in comedic fashion is likewise the way it happened. It was cathartic and felt every bit as much when I wrote it.
You told me earlier “Coming of Rage” is not a violent book, that the stories within are more concerned with handling adversity. How so?
Exactly. The way the world is right now, especially with the younger generations, we’re seeing unprecedented levels of violence, killing, shooting, theft, destruction, reckless driving, hatred, racism, homophobia, keyboard warring, just belligerent disrespect for one another. This is the most divided our country has been since the American Civil War. I’ll stop the analogy there, but my purpose to writing my stories here had more to do with challenging my protagonists to see what they’re made of. To see if they can live by a moral fiber modern society is seriously devoid of. A lack of empathy for one another is the undoing of our culture.
In one of these stories, “Watching Me Fall,” I have a young woman who’s been raped by a drummer from a high profile rock band who was put away then released later when he’s needed for a cash grab reunion tour. How does a violated woman react accordingly? This is what I was most concerned with, and I can say I had no interest in doing “I Spit on Your Grave 18.”
In “B.L.M.” I wanted to explore the Black Lives Matter movement, but from a different angle. Many of my stories in this collection are set in my hometown of Baltimore, and with the Freddie Gray case, we saw the horrific fallout which followed. Protests turning to looting and destruction, racism and strict partisanship amping up around here as much as the rest of our country. I quietly observed and listened to people’s disparate takes on “B.L.M.” as parties of different races and ideologies began to take an interest. Does a white person have the right to join the cause if coming from a pure place of support? That’s my approach to this story.
“Dad’s Notebook” is another personal purge story, only I sent it down a different track when my protagonist, Scott, finds a handwritten journal left to him by his deceased father, whom he’s been at odds with for most of his life. The secret contained inside the notebook will upend Scott’s life entirely. I had a delicious time writing Scott and Kate’s playful romance and hope it resonates with people. “In Search of Dave the Wave” also gave me joy to write and the only way I can describe it without dropping a spoiler is that many people aren’t what they seem, but they can evolve and find new meaning, even when their shady past comes calling.
So what does the flaming guitar on the cover represent if all the stories aren’t about music, per-se?
Well, I can offer that two of my stories, “Chasing the Moon” and “Watching Me Fall” came about through my experiences as a music journalist. “Chasing the Moon” is a direct tale of one of my nights covering live music, though I send it down an added tube of temptation. The former part happened, the latter is fiction. The underlying current is frustration at a failing life exacerbated by mishap. A number of times I ran into slipshod moments covering bands at a live venue where a tour manager missed putting in my credentials or outright blew me off. Ask any of my peers who have written about music, they’ll tell you the same. It challenges your mettle, that’s for sure.
Of course, “Watching Me Fall” is affected by my time in the scene, at least from the point-of-view I present of the rapist drummer and how he’s looking to rebuild a life after his stint in the house of correction. This, not knowing who and what’s waiting to thwart his re-emergence.
Each story, however, has a theme of music in some fashion or another. It’s direct or indirect, but even in the final story, “Comic Con,” about the trials of an independent comic book writer trying to push his work into the scene, there’s a whiff of music. My editor and cover artist, Tara Caribou, really gets who I am when it comes to my love of music and what I did in the industry back then. She came up with an engaging cover design which did my heart good. Sometimes I miss being in the music industry, and this was one way to stay connected.
Is “Coming of Rage” your first published book?
Actually, no. Many moons ago I wrote a novel I kind of disown, mostly because of the shady publisher which no longer exists. Also because of the gaudy cover art and hell, I’m not the same guy who wrote it. It’s called “Mentor.” I was proud of it then. I even went down to Savannah, Georgia to start my promotion when I dropped a coin onto the U.S. map to see where it fell. I was 30 then. You do goofy stuff between ages 20 and 40. I was writing in the music and horror industries for 16 years after “Mentor” came out. I pretty much reinvented myself and moved on from it, you know?
Would you ever consider sending it elsewhere to publish or even rewrite it if you’re unsatisfied with it? Seems like a lot of time to invest in a body of work you distance yourself from.
True, Terry, you have a point. My fiancée, TJ, has suggested a few times that I revisit “Mentor” and rewrite it. Maybe, but not right now. I have a lot of other projects going on and future works I’m fleshing out. As the song goes, I have higggghhhh hopes…
Tell me about these other projects.
I appreciate you asking. I am on the fifth draft of a novel I wrote titled “Revolution Calling.” It’s largely autobiographical with some elaboration here and there and it reaches a point of destruction that’s all fiction. I call it an Outsiders for Gen X, heavy metal style. It’s deeply personal for the most part, and since Netflix has seemed to have taken a liking toward metal culture these days with the “Metal Lords” film and Eddie from Stranger Things Season 4 becoming an immediate pop icon already, now’s the time for this.
You’re right about Eddie and The Hellfire Club. What do you make of all this love for Eddie? I knew you back when you still had all that metal gear on you. The guy I see now…
Is now an old man jock-nerd, ha! Yeah, I mean, wow, right as the first block of Season 4 of Stranger Things episodes came, my son kept telling me on our drives to school that metal wasn’t cool and metalheads in middle school were persecuted as much as they were in my day. Granted, in high school, I managed to overcome the heckling and harassment and it was a combination of taking weightlifting for three years and branching out to kids from all walks of life. I consider myself an exception to the metal true norm, though I certainly have my scruples when it comes to the music itself.
Look, headbangers are people too, which is my founding principle to “Revolution Calling.” Eddie in Stranger Things just gave metal an “it” factor we never had back then. We were “grits” unless we fawned over our style to lure the ladies like Jon Bon Jovi. When I first saw Eddie’s character on the show, I thought he was a bit over-the-top and controlling as the Hellfire Club Dungeon Master. I didn’t see much other than looks to bridge him to my generation of metal. However, as the show progressed, he turned into this underdog you couldn’t help but root for, and once he summoned his personal strength to stand up for what’s right, how can you not like the guy? Kudos, Netflix, well-played. Funny how it all turns out, though. My son is now Eddie-obsessed and he even plays “Master of Puppets” to impress me and TJ. Win!
What was the last thing you ate?
Funny enough, I finished a bowl of Mediterranean from Mezeh before we spoke. Mezah’s my jam. Chicken shawarma with arugula, spinach, Turkish salad, Lebanese tabbouleh, spicy hummus, couscous, feta, cranberries, baba ganoush, sumac cucumbers, lemon mint carrots with tzatziki and s’hug. It’s bank.
Are you a drinker? If so, are you a beer, whiskey or wine guy?
Umm, yes, please?
You told me you’d like to write for comic books. If you could write any character, which one would it be?
Just to be asked to write any comic book would be an honor and I might go have a private cry if that happens. Given my recent parody I wrote for my site, “Roads Lesser Traveled” titled “When Moon Knight Cheated on Khonshu With Sekhmet,” and given my pantheon is heavily Egyptian, Moon Knight would be de facto.
What do you like to do outside of writing?
Fitness is my biggest passion outside of writing and reading. I hit the gym 3 to 4 days a week, though that’s down from 5 when I was pretty gym obsessed. From last December through April of this year, I had multiple injuries which I had to overcome and gnaw through. Happily, my chiropractor and massage therapist put me right for a Spartan event I recently completed. Never give up on yourself, but as you get older, listen to what you’re body’s telling you! I do a lot of hiking, especially with TJ, one of our many common interests.
I love sports, particularly baseball, football and hockey. I did NHL game analysis for a year back in 1999, but don’t put me on a pair of skates these days; it’d be a complete train wreck! Comic books, yeah. Anyone who knows me knows I’m a total comic dweeb and have been immersed in them since 1978. Music, that goes without saying. I love the beach, art galleries, history, horror, sci-fi, movies, traveling. Yeah, traveling and meeting friends in different states. 2018 was an absolute blast as I took many trips by myself and met so many of my comrades and pals in the music industry, a lot being first time face-to-face. Oh, and coming up with obscure cartoon references and impersonations with TJ. She is more than my match there.
You’ve had a lot of interesting experiences over the years based on our conversation earlier. Is there anything you regret at this point in your life?
I try not to push negative energy in that direction since life is challenging enough without dwelling on any past regrets or wishes for do-overs. My life has changed greatly in the past couple years and almost all of it’s to the good. I’m blessed to have a woman who loves me enough to do all she’s done to bring me and my son into her life, and to give me complete happiness. If I do regret anything, it’s any and all mistakes I’ve made which may have hurt others, even when it was for the good. I wish I’d stuck with drumming since I was mediocre at best and twice sold my Gretsch kits. I kinda wish I’d gotten started with Spartan earlier than I did, since I’m not sure I’ll ever complete a Trifecta. I take what my body gives me. We’ll see.
I’m more thankful than the opposite for the way my life has gone. It’s been valleys and peaks and I’ve enjoyed varying degrees of success. Nothing gives you more of a strut in your instep than collecting your credentials at Will Call and hearing “Blabbermouth’s in the house!” make its way through the venue. Writing for them was a summit. I’ll never undercut or oversell how that feels, but it is a rush, for certain. Mostly, I’m grateful to all my friends, family and readers of my work. The valleys are fewer than before and I see a lot of mountains in my view ready to ascend.
Coming of Rage will be released August 1, 2022 through Raw Earth Ink.
I’m a lifelong lover of comic books, having started my infatuation with them in 1978. Following their exploits for decades, two characters burned in my mind as deserving of a broader audience beyond their cult fan status. Working in a comic book shop in the 1990s and through the mainstream hijacking of superhero films, I’ve said time and again how Black Panther and Moon Knight were worthy of comeuppance. Not merely because they are connected through a mutual goddess, Bast.
It took all the way until 2018 for Black Panther to shake the world as Stan Lee envisioned his gravity back in the 1960s. Rest in power, Chadwick Boseman. Meanwhile, Moon Knight has long been relegated to a minor tier fan favorite. Call him a deep cut of the Marvel U. The Fist of Khonshu has only recently broken through this year with Oscar Isaacs pulling off the unthinkable in a triumphant depiction of not one, but multiple lead characters in Moon Knight’s Disney Plus miniseries.
Comics-speaking, Moon Knight is the bipolar earthly avatar of the Egyptian moon god, Khonsu–written as Khonshu in the comics and t.v. show. The struggles of central human host, Marc Spector, wrestling with his dissociative personality disorder while fighting crime, has ushered some emotively compelling storytelling in recent years.
To really know Moon Knight is to understand his nuances. Marc Spector is a man of the Jewish faith fighting on behalf of Egypt. All eyes on you, Rameses II. Worse, he’s fighting his violent deeds as a mercenary forced to share head space with a proverbial cab driver (Jake Lockley), a rich socialite (Steven Grant), a masked, bruising Dapper Dan (Mr. Knight) and the shadow warrior himself.
I had a burst of inspiration after reading the latest issue of Jed Mackay’s run of Moon Knight, then chatting with my pantheon after drawing a tarot reading on myself. It was my patron warrior and healer goddess, Sekhmet, and a writer’s best buddy, Thoth, who nudged me to generate a tongue-in-cheek piece, thrusting Marc Spector into an even weirder “What if?” scenario than usually comes out of The House of Ideas…
When Moon Knight Cheated on Khonshu with Sekhmet…
THE SCENE: In the Manhattan apartment of Marc Spector, aka Moon Knight, aka Mr. Knight, aka Steven Grant, aka Jake Lockley. Spector and his various personae are leafing through a photo album of Spector’s childhood years. Spector is drinking a glass of deep red and holding his head like he has the mother of all hangovers. It’s only 1:36 a.m. His fists are raw and already scabbing from the night’s activities when his patron lunar god, Khonshu makes an unexpected appearance…
Khonshu: “My son…”
Marc Spector: “Yeah? Oh, great, it’s you.”
Moon Knight: “What is your bidding, my Lord?”
Jake Lockley: “Yo!”
Mr. Knight: “Shit, I have a wine stain on my tie. What, is it Mercury Retrograde again already? You would have to pick tonight for one of your edification sessions, Khonshu.”
Jake Lockley: “That’s what you get for wearing an entire suit of white all the time, Snowball.”
Steven Grant: “Don’t sweat the small stuff. I’m a regular at Lemire’s Cleaners down on Pinehurst and 54th. Tell them I said to take care of you and put it on my account.”
Khonshu: “Sigh…Thoth help me… My son, I had a disturbing chat with Sekhmet moments ago…”
Mr. Knight: “2015 vintage cabernet, no less.”
Steven Grant: “How topical. I just bought a few bottles of Cabernet Franc from this vineyard outside of Cooperstown last week. I’d swear upon Ani’s writings the blackcurrants were blessed by Renenutet herself.”
Mr. Knight: “I’d bet my ruby-crusted ankh we’re talking about the same place.”
Steven Grant: “We’ve traveled the same circles, obviously.”
Jake Lockley: “Did someone mention alcohol? I’m a little dry.”
Marc Spector: “Can it, guys, I’ve got this.”
Moon Knight: “Quit posing, Spector. I do all the dirty work around here. I am the chosen one, after all.”
Mr. Knight: “Running a few merc ops without getting yourself killed will give anyone a superiority complex. Doesn’t do a Goddess-damned thing for my predicament, though. I wonder if Brioni has 24-7 customer service.”
Jake Lockley: “Primadonna.”
Khonshu: “Grrrr, and I thought the Fifth Dynasty were full of themselves… Getting to the matter at-hand, I am informed you may have been colluding with the cat goddess…”
Mr. Knight: “Bastet has the most exquisite tailoring, and she gives hella good cat scratch fever.”
Jake Lockley: “You wish, Desmond Merrion.”
Khonshu: “Quiet! Again, I am referring to Sekhmet. A tryst is said to have occurred only hours ago.”
Jake Lockley: “Don’t look at me, man. I was taking a fare to the Gaga show at the Garden. Some fat cat high roller who tips like crap. Which is to say, not all.”
Stephen Grant: “That was me, you idiot! And Misty Knight, whom you had the gall to blow her cover bringing up that Daughters of Liberty gig anyone in our racket knows is on the down low. Also on the no-discuss list, she’s been clipping the wings of Captain America lately. Not Rogers, the Wilson guy. Both my Cap, for the record. Yes, I’m rambling.”
Mr. Knight: “Of all the… Misty was supposed to be my date. Well, if you consider a night of binging Ancient Aliens with my famous lime-drizzled fish tacos and guac loaded with ghost peppers an actual date. Here I thought we had a connection with the name thing…”
Khonshu: “Enough of this confounded prattling! This is what I get for taking on a five-for-one avatar. Horus, take me now. Anywhere.”
Jake Lockley: “The Deftones are playing the Stone Pony in Asbury tomorrow. Just saying.”
Moon Knight: “My Lord, the details are cloudy, but I do recall running into Sekhmet on the astral plane. I was summoned by Anubis to meditate after I knocked the teeth out of this worm dung trying to jump an old lady down in the Garment District. Anubis advised I may have used a bit of excessive force. That’s when I seem to remember Sekhmet interjecting.”
Khonshu: “You mean exchanging energies, the polite way of putting things, my once-loyal embodiment. Sekhmet is not easily appeased, fair warning.”
Moon Knight: “I don’t know what you’re getting at, my Lord, but Sekhmet approved of the brutalizing. In fact, she offered to sanction me to the Council. We have chimera to thwart, plus vampires, renegade griffin, those K’un-Lun rejects calling themselves the Red Right Hands, skin walkers dressed like Amazon Prime drivers, even unholy Apep once a week.”
Jake Lockley: “Apep’s become such a slacker.”
Marc Spector: “So that’s why I wanted a steak so bad tonight. I’m not usually a cravings kind of guy and I take my meat cooked medium. This one was done rare, and I ate it in minutes, even without A-1. I never eat a steak without A-1. Something’s shady.”
Moon Knight: “Yes, Sekhmet mentioned the steak. She was offended you never gave her an offering, Spector. It was bone-in ribeye, what were you thinking? Sekhmet says it’s possible to stay in her graces by leaving a pint of Guinness milk stout at her ka statue in Migdol. Her consort, Lord Ptah, also requests an homage paid in beer, though he prefers an IPA. Or a summer wheat. He’s less picky.”
Jake Lockley: “IPA? There’s just no accounting for taste, even amongst the gods.”
Marc Spector: “In Egypt? Are you insane, Moon Knight?”
Steven Grant: “That’s speculative.”
Mr. Knight: “Define insane.”
Jake Lockley: “Insane is drinking IPA.”
Moon Knight: “My ba and my akh need serious modification before the Maat Kheru ever takes place. Ammit the Devourer will eat me before the scales ever pass judgment at this point.”
Khonshu: “Need I remind you, Spector, with great power comes…”
Steven Grant: “Careful, great Lord, I smell infringement.”
Marc Spector: “I heard the same spiel from that Parker kid a year ago. You see where ethics gets him in this city.”
Khonshu: “Sigh…there’s hardly enough opium in Saqqara to put up with… Tread carefully, Marc Spector. I can take that which I have given.”
Marc Spector: “Why is this always about me, for Christ’s sake?”
Jake Lockley: “Aww, now you’ve done it, bringing up His name… Get me my yarmulke, quick. Is tomorrow Saturday, by chance?”
Mr. Knight: “Now am I right to insinuate that you…or, rather, we, were shaking sheets with The Mistress of Dread earlier tonight? If so, one, I wish I remembered it. Two, is Ptah pissed off? I’m in the middle of building a wooden bird feeder for all the robins which keep showing up. They pound seed like Lockley does a rum runner…or six.”
Jake Lockley: “Eff you, Snowball.”
Mr. Knight: “Three, if you’re doing it with something that’s human in body and a lioness in the head, is that still considered bestiality?”
Khonshu: “Set, I just know this is your doing…”
Moon Knight and all his images and various personae are owned by Marvel Comics.
This farce is written with longtime love and respect for the multifaceted world of Marc Spector, along with his chroniclers and devotion to an Egyptian pantheon which prodded Ray Van Horn, Jr. to roast at their expense. Blessed be…
superheroes wane
their chroniclers fade with them
amaranthine gods
–Ray Van Horn, Jr.
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